idle

i hate being idle. sigh. i have to start studying by TODAY or else i'm doomed. like seriously. been pretty occupied last weekend.

i only have 2 WEEKS left before my resit papers. dammit. the feeling of knowing that i have to start but REALLY not moving or progressing even a wee bit is killing me mentally. good god, frustrating........... i'm so sleepy. but i dare not sleep due to feeling of guilt. okay, okay, i shall study tonight, i HAVE TO!!! grrr...

after this 2 weeks i can be free.. AGAIN, that is.

owh, the gutter post is really errr, interesting? haha its filled with obscenities and nudity. you should really view the blog at ur own peril. dont blame me that i never warn u. heh!

how our house is only left with 2 cars coz the white civic is in a REALLY bad condition. it got involved in a accident. you know those accidents that can cause congestion and slows down traffic? yeap, its THAT bad. i'm not the driver. my sister is driving to work, thank god the put on her sit belt. it wasn't her fault. she got caught in between 2 cars.. the accident occured like dominos- one after another cars crasing. she's alright but the antic car which is almost my age or older about a year is in a mess. the back part was smashed and has a big dent in the middle towards the right side causes the "backbone" or should i say the structure of the car out of shape, so there's really no point in repairing it for use again. being a petty car owner like my dad, he said the car wouldnt be in its original state like it used to be anymore. so me sister might get a new car. sigh.

my grandma (mom's side) passed away. on thursday morning. the accident happened on the second day of the funeral. so many unfortunate event occured one after another. grandma's kidney is impaired, her backbones got problems that makes her unable to move very well cause it hurts really badly, as for the kidneys, they were impaired due to usage of high painkillers for the body/backbones aching. she barely can remember anybody coz she was given drugs to ease the pain, so she's always high due the the drugs in her system. but she remembers me. she called my name and said that i've lost weight. sigh. that saddens me more coz she barely remembers anyone but me and my dad and a few more ppl. i dunno, i'm not THAT close to my grandma but i know she loves me and my sister very much.

rest in peace grandma. we all love you very much.

i wont be celebrating chinese new year this year. hmm, i'm not very sad u know. coz chinese new years is not that big of a deal to me. but, wei, my birthday???? aish, i've got no clue. dont really bother bout it for now.

studies first.

gosh i feel so pathetic. where's the active, enthusiastic sannnn???
i've been pretty down for a while. hmm, this contradicts to the san that are able to cheer up right back after few moments of sorrow. i guess u can guess how much this idiotic resit papers affect me. u get the idea.

well, gotta bounce for now.
see you ppl very soon i promise. =)

love yall loads.